...On subbing a whole day by myself & ARTS NIGHT!

This would be a long post if it weren't limited by my need for sleep. Here is the excitement that has happened in the past week, during which I believe I have taken a huge step toward becoming a "REAL" TEACHER:

Subbing: My mentor teacher was unexpectedly really ill, and at the last minute I found out that I was going to be in charge of our entire 1 - Biology, 3 - Biology, 5 - Chemistry day myself, which is really intense. I ended up having about 4 people come in to observe me that day, too. But I rocked it. Seriously, it was great! Of course, I will post photos later, but I managed to do some really cool stuff in my chemistry class, thanks to the advice of a certain genius mentor Melissa. I'm going to post that this weekend though, because it's 11 and I HAVE to write about Arts Night before I go to sleep. The moral of this paragraph, though, is that I can totally handle being by myself, even if I'm still shaky and a little bit unprepared, still, for TWO different preps (classes). Feeling good...

So, on to the really exciting stuff: ARTS NIGHT!
This was basically a night for all of our Arts Core students to show off the skills they had learned this semester in their Arts Core classes. Since we're an arts themed school, this is a big deal. There were yoga demonstrations, break dancing sessions, choreographed dancing, band performances (one by students who had only played for 5 weeks!) and short skits performed. The entire event lasted about 1.5 hours, and was accompanied by an academic display of student work at the back of the gymnasium. Families were invited ----- and the gym was FULL. People had to stand. It was, in a word, inspiring!

I hear so much about how our students' families "don't care" and "aren't there" but they were there in full force tonight to support their students. Watching the kids perform with big smiles and, quite honestly, the passion in their hearts for what they were doing showing through on those smiles - it really gave me quite a start. I realized that this school has really become a part of me, and with only 5/6 weeks to go, I'm going to have to start letting it go a little. I've really put my whole self into this student teaching internship...and by doing that I've fully invested in these kids. I realized that I have to start talking soon about when I leave, so that I'm not abandoning them...because I really feel that I have become a part of their schedules, their routines, even maybe their lives. They have certainly become a solid part of mine.

Tonight, I really realized the power of the community my students come from. It's the type of community that I've always craved: a bunch of people who are SO different from each other, but united by SOMETHING. They're not always united, but the possibility exists, and tonight I saw that. There were no fights, no teasing, not even any drunk kids showing up (that I saw). This was a night relatively devoid of high school debauchery. These students took PRIDE in their work. Like I said, I was inspired....

On the other hand, it really made me sad to think that I won't get to see these particular students through their high school years. I won't be able to teach at this school, but I can hope for a community like this one. I'm really going to miss these kids, but I know that I will carry a lot of them in my heart and mind for a long time, since they are the ones who have really been teaching me how to teach (along with my mentor teacher, of course). These are the people who are shaping how I do things as an educator, and these are the students that I will think back on and be motivated by for quite some time.

In other words, I love my experience thus far, and it really floors me that things are this great. I want to bottle up this enthusiasm for the hard times that I'm sure are to come in my remaining weeks here...but I know now that the highs and lows are part of the job, for me. Tonight, I'm floating high high high, and I am so proud of both the work my students have done and the pride they are taking in it.

They have SO MUCH to be proud of!

Signing off....it's past 11 now....must sleep!

Photos...

Here are some photos you can enjoy.

1. The type of vitamins I have to take now, sitting on top of a pile of grading that is beginning to require its own "INBOX" on my desk.


2. The attempt I made to explain "atomic radius" to my chemistry students. They hated it. "Ms. Kramer, no offense, but that's.....well it's just weird. It doesn't have anything to do with chemistry!" Bad representation....bad analogy....but I got to use the school copier to print a worksheet that said, "rollin' on dubs" :)...


I've been sick, and barely getting by with planning and such. So I'm going to go and keep working on that...

...On never writing on your blog

Well, I guess I should start by apologizing to the 3 people that read this blog since I haven't updated it since....well, it's been awhile.

I go back to school tomorrow, and I only have 2 1/2 months left.
In the spirit of the new year, let's run through the good and bad stuff that's happened since I left you hanging (all 3 of you).

Here we go:

We got to do some cool experiments in biology with eggs. Basically, Devin (the other science teacher candidate) and I put eggs in vinegar and let them sit for a few days, then rubbed the shells off. This leaves only the membrane behind, and provides a really cool model of a cell for showing diffusion and osmosis. Of course, this makes the rooms smell like vinegar and eggs, so there's that. Devin and I had a great 2 hour session of rubbing shells off eggs and just catching up; it was quite a treat in the climax of last quarter (the quarter from HELL). The students thought the eggs were totally nasty (they were RIGHT) but they had such awesome ideas about what was happening to them, and got really into designing experiments and talking science. It was great.

I bonded rather strongly with one of our biggest "troubled" students in our biology class. He informed me (this is the conversation in which we bonded) that he has 2 assault convictions, 1 residential burglary conviction, and 1 theft conviction. He is currently facing 2 more assault charges. Doesn't sound like the nicest guy, does he? But.....he really is quite a cool kid. He left for winter break, however, declaring he couldn't wait for the "party at his house tonight". After a few warnings from me about being safe and smart, he said, "Don't worry, Ms. Kramer, it's in an apartment complex. No one gets caught having parties in apartment complexes." Uhhhhh, yeah, kid, you have a lot to learn. :)

Major highlight: A student who normally sits back and feels intimidated by other students totally took charge of his lab group, "Well, we aren't going to get anything done unless we do what we need to do. So you have to listen to me now." It was amazing to see him take charge like that. Go, little science leader, go! :)

I have only been in our 5th period chemistry class on Fridays, since my fall class schedule (UW) didn't allow me to be there M-Th. The last week before break, I was able to go full-time to my school. On Monday, when I walked into 5th period, one student said, "Ms. Kramer? MS. KRAMER'S HERE, GUYS!" and EVERYONE in the class cheered for me. It had been a particularly hard day, and I had to fight from crying it made me so happy. Ahhhh, juniors and seniors. So much NICER than freshmen and sophomores......

The week before break unfortunately resulted in several suspensions and some expulsions for our students. Apparently this is normal in, at least, our school, to have chaos right before the breaks. One student attacked another in the hall, seemingly unprovoked and kept hitting her even though she wasn't fighting back. Another robbed a student before school of his backpack, iPod, wallet, and WINTER COAT. It was probably about 25 degrees that morning. Those two have been expelled, and it's really too bad because even though they obviously have trouble making good choices, they both had lots of potential. Especially the boy who robbed another student. He was so good at science, but just didn't see it as something that was worthwhile to him. These are the students who motivate me to teach. :)

A student came up to me after our last class before break and whispered, "Ms. Kramer, when are you going to teach us again? I really like when you teach."

An ELL student who I speak Spanish to the most (and badly) gave me a Christmas card. He wrote in Spanish AND translated it to English, and there might be a little "Spanglish" (Naviday). SO cute, and warmed my heart just in time for winter break because I have been working hard to encourage him to use English in class.

In my "non-teaching life" (which, let's face it, doesn't really exist), I have been snowshoeing, visiting, relaxing, enjoying local jazz shows, concerts, and just spending time with the lovely people in my life that I never get to see (read: my boyfriend and my roommates......pathetic, right?).

Things are starting up again, and I'm heading into the new quarter (UW) teaching chemistry this time. More on that later..... :)

lockdown!

We had a lockdown on Friday, during 5th period. We had just had a drill last week, so we knew that this was a serious thing. There had also been a pretty significant fight at lunch involving a girl whose family sometimes gets involved, so that's what my mentor teacher thought might be going on.

We found out later that a neighbor had reported gunshots in the park next to the school, so we were locked down until the sheriff could search the area and declare it clear.

We were only locked down for about ten minutes, but it was pretty adrenaline-filled. I was in charge of locking the door, and the entire ten minutes all I could think about was whether I had actually locked it or not (even though I checked it when I locked it).

Since then, I've had a few dreams about people coming into schools with weapons and taking people hostage. Yuck. It was in those ten minutes of lockdown that I realized just how responsible I am for those kids....it was a sobering thought.

Anyway, that's the news of the day! Happy, eh?

You must be a teacher if....

...you are grading on Sunday evening and your desk looks like THIS:

...On The First Week of Teaching My Own Unit!

A dear old friend just reminded me that I have a blog. :) What can I say, it's been hectic!

You can probably tell that I've been busy, since I'm updating this at 6:03 am. Well, it's now or never!

Last week I began teaching a unit that I designed myself. Needless to say, I was pretty worried about how it would turn out. A) I'd never done it before and B) I'd never done it before. My mentor teacher was very supportive, though, and last week went great! Here's some highlights:

1. When describing the big drop down in numbers of a rabbit population, a student said, "It DRAMASTICALLY decreased!" Now, the blogger is underlining that as a misspelled word, but I think he may have been on to something!
2. I overheard two students having a conversation about drugs and had to approach one of them about it. She received it really well and even *seemed* to value my opinion. Hm....
3. When asked for ideas about how natural selection works, some students blew me away with the science that is built into their brains:
a. Student 1: Wait, so none of this matters, right? I mean, does it even matter if animals get eaten if they mate first? Cuz don't they just want to mate and that's their life goal?
b. Student 2: I think that maybe this fox would be able to adapt to a new environment, it would just take a really long time, since you have to wait for them to have babies.
4. I have several students who were seriously lacking in engagement and participation, and they are not only participating and not whining about class anymore, but they are GETTING 7 and 8 out of 9 ON THEIR QUIZZES! Before, a lot of them would just write "IDK". For those non-hip people who don't know text acronyms: IDK = I Don't Know.

I wish I had time to post everything that I want to post here, but I don't. Just know that I am excited, glad to be where I am, and finding that although my days have somehow all become 14 hour days, I am finding ways to stay sane and I am TEACHING these KIDS SOMETHING. It's amazing!

This is definitely the profession for me. Not to say it's not hard a lot of the time, but the rewarding parts are so worth it.

Cheers, everyone; I'll try to post more often!

...On Getting the Hang of Things!

So, I know it's been awhile since I've posted....and this isn't going to be a long post. I just want to point out that the length between postings should indicate to you about how busy I am. So yeah, I've been busy. In fact, I'm supposed to be reading for tomorrow right now. But I thought I'd throw something up here first.

Teaching is hard. It's a ton of energy, even more time, and so often there is no sign of impact. At best, a day goes by where nothing really big happens. I've found that this is the attitude you get if you don't focus on the little positive things. So here's my amended philosophy....

Teaching is hard. It's a ton of energy, even more time, and so often there is no sign of impact. But if you really look hard at every interaction you have with a student, you begin to see big signs of impact. To illustrate this, I'd like to share a few short anecdotes. Then, it's off to bed (er...reading).

1) Thursday. 4th period. Student are ROWDY today, not sure why, but all classes have been like this today. My mentor teacher is tired, frustrated, and sick of asking kids why they're 10 minutes late to class. (Or do we even want to know?) She asks if I can take the class for just 10 minutes, so she can step out for some fresh air to recharge. Sure, no problem. Still won't settle down, so I decide, on the spot, to try something new. I say, relatively quietly, but oh-so-firm-and-disappointed, "You know.....you guys and girls can really do better than this. No, I'm not kidding. I know you can do great work, and I don't know why today it's so difficult, but I know you can do better. You know, why don't you...yeah, repeat after me: 'We will do better!'" The class murmurs, "wewilldobetter...." I say, "No, no, WE WILL DO BETTER!" The class says "We will do better!" except one student....one student who never speaks up for good reasons, who never participates, and can't write down assignments to save his life....this student stands up and says, "I WILL DO BETTER!" I look at him, and say, "Yes! [Student], that's great, let's say THAT! I WILL DO BETTER!" The whole class, "I WILL DO BETTER!" It was marvelous, and after that they were loud but still got their work done....not sure why it worked for that one student, or the class, but it did. It made me feel great, because you know what? It shows that somewhere under that nervous, uncertain exterior, there are INSTINCTS. And that's what really makes a teacher.

2) Friday. 4th period again. Short classes today, kids are rowdy (what is it? a weather change?!). A student who is failing (at like 20%) for some reason is energized by her "role" as a physical anthropologist in the activity we're working on today (started on Thursday), and keeps calling me over to talk about fossils. She wants to know how they're made, and tells me that her family was driving somewhere and found a big skeleton of a big cat (think lynx, cougar, bobcat, not tabby or siamese). She's never spoken to me with excitement before, and certainly hasn't ever looked me in the eye. I'm puzzled, but excited too, so I chat with her about it while I can (this is a busy, high maintenance activity for the students). She leaves class that day, saying, in singsong, "Bye, Ms. Kramer!!!" I'm still puzzled, but energized by her uncorked enthusiasm. Later, I'm leaving school, and she's sitting outside waiting for a ride home. She looks up, sees me before I can say hi, and her whole face brightens. She says, excitedly, "Hi, Ms. Kramer!" I say hi back to her, smiling as big as ever, tell her to have a great weekend, and keep moving. She has no idea the start she's given me to my own weekend, and thinking back on this....I'm still smiling for her.

Those are just two of the little victories I've had in the past two days of teaching. I can't stress enough how much these matter to me, how much they keep me going. They also encourage me, because these tiny little connections I'm making with students mean that they can tell I care about them. They're letting me in, little by little, whether they know it or not. And that is a HUGE victory, because once they trust me, I will descend upon them with science! :) No, but seriously, the realization that I can be respected and trusted after a little over a month interacting with these students is quite an honor for me. When I see 5th period (who I only see once a week), I can tell the distance that is between the students and me. They still talk to me, and still know my name, but they don't trust me. And why would they? I'm never there. That will change soon, but for now I have all of my small victories to carry me!

This got long....didn't expect that! If you're still reading, thanks! I like sharing my victories the most!